another  must-see movie

This last weekend Marcia & I saw two films in the cinema, over the stretch of 2 nights. We don’t go to the cinema all that often, so this was unusual for us. We saw Michel Jackson’s ‘This is it’, and we saw ‘Where the wild things are!’.

Can’t help but feel very sad about Michel Jackson’s early death. What an enormously gifted man, and how wonderful to see him rise during those rehearsal times (where & when the filming was done). It looks like it was going to be a GREAT CONCERT, that never actually happened. I was very touched by a number of beautiful moments in the film, moments where he was singing without musical backing, moments where he was improvising, and other moments of inter-action with members of the cast & crew of the show. Definitely a MUST SEE  film, to be seen in the cinema!

Michael has (co-) written many great songs, and his whole expression (physically/ vocally) is so VERY UNIQUE; he is mesmerizing!  With him on stage, the stage is filled; without him it is open & waiting to be filled. 

I was very impressed with the quality of the filming and the sound and the amount of film material. It seems almost as if they (?) had planned to make this film (of the rehearsal period). Obviously some footage will  have been shot after Michael’s untimely death, but there is plenty of film material with him in it. Makes me wonder, why were they doing all this filming? What would have happened to this footage, had the concerts in London gone ahead as planned?

While cast & crew have great respect for Michael, he keeps his distance and rarely comes out of his shell. He wears sunglasses most of the time, and kind of hides behind a lot of hear, it seems to me. He is obviously saving himself for the real work (giving the 50 concerts), and slowly gearing himself in the demanding work of dancing & singing and carrying the burden of the whole production etc. Michael’s dancers & singers admire him greatly, and stir him up every once in a while to open up, open out, let rip. Occasionally he does, to an extend, and those are beautiful moments.

My impression of Michael was that he is (was) Peter Pan indeed; never quite grown up. His best qualities are child like qualities. It is as if he put all negativity and pain aside (inside himself) and decided to be like Peter Pan. As a result of not really digesting the trouble & pain, he didn’t really move on, and could only repeat himself with his songs and movements. On stage he could come alive; of stage he (perhaps) didn’t quite know who he was. 

In the film it became obvious (to me)  that there was no new inspiration; Michael was simply repeating himself, even after a 10 year absence from the concert stage. It looked like Michael had developed some new movements, and the concept for the show had some new ideas (?), but on the whole that didn’t invigorate me, not in this film. In a way, what did strike me was the knowledge that Michael’s funeral service would be held in this same auditorium just weeks later, with most of his backing vocalists and dancers participating. Would it have been possible for Michael to know, to have some inclination, that this was going to happen? Did he feel he had it IN HIM to go to London and hold large audiences captive for 50 nights running? Did he feel during those rehearsal days that the show was really coming together?  It struck me that at one point Michael mentions that this last run will be his final stage appearance. Could it be that he began to realize that this ‘final’  tour could become  an uninspired repeating-himself grueling 50 day night-mare? Will we ever find out what caused his death, and how aware Michael was about risks he was taking (with drugs etc.). That, I’m sure we’ll never know. It could even be, that all these questions were too delicate for Michael to openly confront, and that much of the struggle was unconscious, or at least pushed away  into the small night hours. 

Now he sleeps the for-ever sleep.  God bless his family, and all those beautiful people dancing & singing with him, including the man who made this beautiful film: ‘This is it!’ 

The next night Marcia & I saw ‘Where the WILD THINGS are!’.  WHAT AN AMAZING FILM! GO SEE IT!! This is not a film for children. It is a film about a young boy, and is world, his perceptions, and how he uses his imagination to work through his conflicts. In the film we experience the boys (imaginary?) adventures, as he visits a far away place ‘where -indeed- the wild things are’; the boy is quite a wild thing himself.

Marcia & I used to have the book (from which the film was written & designed). I always had a special love for that book. I read it to and with Dan, when he was little. The film is remarkable close to the book, in more ways than one. Beautifully made, a huge amount of work must have gone into this cinematic miracle! Slowly moving, but always with an undercurrent of pending danger, which is very much the boy’s  perception of (his) life. The boy in the film deserves an OSCAR- he is completely natural and totally brilliant. I will buy the DVD; I want to own this film!  The creatures that the boy meets, and that make him their King, are all reflections of his family, including the father that no longer lives at home (we never see him), and possibly some neighbors and/ or close friends. While the sound of their voices is so familiar, their bodies, their ideas and words, and their actions are (at times) wonderfully off the wall, out of the box, if not crazy. My favorite line in the movie (when the boy is leaving the wild things to go back home): “You’re the first king we haven’t eaten!”

The imagery of the film is FANTASTIC, the music is BRILLIANT, the boy is MESMERIZING (the king of the world indeed, which is a tittle given to him by his father). The WILD THINGS are AMAZING to watch in their expressions and body language. This is altogether a TOP FILM!! Not to be missed!

singing diary

Last Saturday, October 31st, I was invited to do some Story Singing @ the River Church for the Platinum Group; first time for me to take the Story-Singing into my home church. There is so much that I wanted to do, many songs, all kinds of scripture to speak (including some Psalms), several stories (& songs). In the end I felt I should do a synopsis of the Moses story, ending it with the Hebrew’s escape from Pharaoh & his army through the sea. What a great story, and my telling of it has grown over the years.  Great to have a chance to sing & tell in this anointed place.  Can’t wait to do some more!

From an Angel’s PoV

While waiting for a traffic-light today, I read a bumper sticker on the car in front which kind of shocked me. It read:

OK you’ve got your change, but I still have my God and freedom, and I’ll hide my guns and money.

CAn you believe someone actually bothered to put this text on a sticker, and some else bothered to put this strange piece of communication on their car. It certainly got me thinking!

vision & mission- Oct. 26th ‘09

A couple of years ago heaven gave us a VISION for a round building that would be a mix of a coffee place, a community meeting place, a place for LIVE entertainment & short FILM; we decided to call it: the Story Cafe.  A British architect friend did some amazing drawings, and in the process we studied the concept of this special place, and we developed a few options (larger building smaller building etc.).

Since than nothing much has happened with this GRAND idea. Often we’ve wondered weather we should buy a plot of land, and simply build the first Story Cafe. But clearly, having a building (and a huge mortgage on it) is not suddenly make the Story Cafe happen. We would need a team of people to run it, and a serious budget to keep the place open until -finally- business would begin to happen etc. No the kind of scenario you gladly step into. So we’ve waited to act on this vision, while busy with other visionary work.

A few weeks ago I feel I had a brainwave, an inspired moment, a spark from heaven I believe. Suddenly I saw that what we need here is ONE NAME, that covers three things: an ACTIVITY, a MOVEMENT, and a (series of) BUILDING (s).  We start with the activity which eventually grows into a movement which in due course will require a building. The name of this activity/ movement/ building: Story Express!   

We are excited about this! Now we have a beginning! This coming December 5th we are planning our first Story Express! event. It will be along the lines of Story-Round which we did in Wales once a month. First half of the evening (45 min.) will be given to a Christian entertainer (singer/ story-teller). There will be an interval with coffee & tea and soft drinks as well as cakes & deserts. The second half of the evening is OPEN FLOOR!  People can tell their (testimony) stories, sing songs, speak poems, do a mime, a dance or drama, and we’ll let the entertainer finish the evening. We’re looking forward to this event, hopefully the first of many. 

For more information about the VISION behind this initiative, go to: www.entertainingangels.us and click Story Express (on the Opening Page). People carry amazing stories! Each person who became Born of the Spirit has a UNIQUE and IMPORTANT story! This story, which is part of their LIFE story, describes a TURNING POINT in their life! Scripture describes how we are to overcome (darkness) by the blood of the Lamb, and the word of our TESTIMONY!  (Revelation 12: 11) People need to tell their (testimony) story and realize how powerful this story is; realize how God can use their (testimony) story to touch OTHERS!  In the telling of our stories we take further ownership of that story and learn to fully take on board what was given to us (when the events of the story happened). If we don’t tell the story (regularly) we run the risk of slowly losing what was gained (when the events took place); in the end the enemy will (try to) tell us ‘it never even happened’. 

Our stories are powerful communicators! They describe what actually HAPPENED TO US; nobody can argue with that, and in the telling, the power of these events, the miracle working power, becomes tangible, present in the atmosphere!  When stories of healing are being told, fresh healing might take place to other people!  The stories often speak of people’s struggles, their (inner) conflicts and how they found a way out, a way forward.

The Scriptures are full of stories like this, and by telling those stories we invite the same Holy Spirit that moved through these amazing events, to move again, in our midst. This is the LIVING Word of God.

So in Story Express! we want to celebrate all kinds of inspired stories. Stories of ‘becoming born-of-the-Spirit’, stories of  healing, stories of miraculous provision, stories of inner healing & restoration, and last but not least stories from Scripture!

We ’see’ small groups of people meeting in their homes, or in coffee bars, restaurants, or any public space, to tell each other their stories, and stories from Scripture. Just like people coming together to discuss a book or a film, which is being done in lots of places. Why not Story Express! in the such groups?!

singing diary-Oct. 26th ‘09

With all the business of this year (2009), Marcia & I working through Dan’s situation here in Plant City and eventually taking Dan to Wales, and me filming many Psalms this year, I simply haven’t had the time to write a blog entree (singing diary) after Story-Singing in Retirement Homes. Yes, I still go in and deliver. It continues to be an amazing and very worthwhile experience; my presentation continues to grow!

I am up to speed on several (Old & New Testament) stories, which are followed up by a song. The GREATER LOVE album is full of great songs, and I’m grateful (great-full) for all that (great) material! If I had the time, I could write many short stories of what happened when going in. NOT ONE TIME has it been bad or boring; NO, every time I go in, something worthwhile happens, the wonderful spirit of heaven moves (the Kingdom) and everybody (including myself) gets blessed!  I’m SO GRATEFUL to have the opportunity to be involved in this (move of the spirit). Quite a few times people have said to ma afterwards, to NEVER STOP doing this. To me it is an amazing exercise, on many levels (physically, musically, mentally, spiritually etc), that keeps me very fit and alert and flowing in the spirit (and in singing, playing, telling, speaking, dancing, laughing…) and enables me to come out of myself and become an open vessel for the Holy Spirit. I see people being liberated,  touched, healed, and turning to Jesus! What a privilege to be part of this precious move of God!

While I continue to go into the Retirement Homes, I am beginning to feel that I should also be going into PRISONS, as well as certain FESTIVALS and celebrations, even house & dinner parties etc. Lord willing I should make a DVD of the kind of work I do in the Retirement Homes (possibly filmed in a couple of Homes), to make this DVD available to the churches, for them to send the DVD to their local Retirement Homes! 

Meanwhile I’ve developed a hunger for more stories! I want to KNOW ALL THE STORIES (in both New & Old Testament). This is a huge challenge, but by God’s grace I’ll take hold of it. I also hope to (co-) write many more songs, to go with the stories. It works SO WELL for me to tell a story, and than sing a song! A great deal of work to be done here, and a serious budget will be needed to bring this vision to reality! By God’s grace it will be done!

family matters- Oct. 26th ‘09

Yes, indeed, Dan has moved to Wales, where he has enrolled in a local college. Welsh education is very good on the whole, and this is a great opportunity for Dan to improve on his English & maths and learn some practical skills.

Life in Florida had become increasingly difficult. No work to be found for Dan, and no college course that appealed to him either. Dan didn’t connect very much with his parent’s church, and local friendships didn’t work out, so in the end there didn’t seem much reason for Dan to be staying here. The idea came to go back to Wales where we, as a family, lived before. Dan got excited about this, as well as about the idea of moving out of his parents home, and beginning to live an independent life (not quite, but still…).

So all three of us travelled to Wales and enjoyed visiting this beautiful country and reconnecting with ‘old’ friends. Billy came back after 10 days, while Marcia stayed on to help Dan get settled etc. Dan now has his own room, is making new friends, and attends the local college. We are pleased for him! Because Dan is in the UK, he can now make visits to the London area where both his birth parents live, not together; both with their spouse and child (children).  While he can only go there for brief visits, we hope that over time Dan will learn more about himself, who he is and what his roots are, and we hope that Dan will begin to understand that he needs to move on in life…

While Marcia & I are on the phone to Dan daily and also speak to various authorities in Wales on a regular basis, we feel we’ve come into a new chapter in our lives where we have (a little) more space for the work that is in our hands; and much work is to be done! Before we moved to Wales (from London in 2000) we went there on holiday trips many times! We LOVE the Welsh countryside. The entire coastline is totally beautiful, the Gower in the South is a paradise, and to the North there is Anglesey, also breath-taking!  Many amazing castles in Wales, old villages, old farms, old bridges. So now that Dan is living there (again) we expect to be visiting and enjoying this great country many more times! All thanks to Dan moving to Wales!

family matters

A week after Dan was arrested, accused of stalking, after we bailed him out and saw a lawyer regarding the criminal court case that we were now bracing ourselves for, we are visited by a Plant City Police Officer, handing us the documents of a Temporary Injunction placed by a local judge against Dan. He is not to go certain places; if he does he’ll be arrested and put in jail immediately. The civil court case is just one week away! Woow, we have been hit by a double whammy: a criminal court case AND a civil court case (both regarding the same situation, and yet 2 separate cases). 

We speak to a second lawyer; a free consultation. The man is excellent, much better than the first lawyer we met, but also a great deal more expensive. Welcome to the USA, the land of lawyers & court cases; they even take credit cards. After consulting with this man we decide to go it alone, as it were, in the civil case. However, we will certainly need a lawyer for the criminal case. I study the materials for the civil case, and prepare as much as I can. I’ll sit with Dan and speak on his behalf (if & when he doesn’t). 

We make it to the court house for 1.30 PM, the time we’re summoned to be there, and get to follow several cases, some with, some without lawyers. Sad situations on the whole, and hugely exhausting to follow all this conflict that people have with each other. Eventually it is our turn; I find it nerve wrecking. The opposing party is a mother & daughter of 17. Before soon, the judge gets the girl to tell her story, and after some time Dan is asked to give his report, his view of things as it were.

The judge is good; he listens well, and is gentle & firm in his interactions with who is there. After a while the judge has heard enough and decides to grant the injunction. The case is suddenly finished and we have to wait to get the papers that are being prepared. In his closing statement the judge tells the mother & daughter to relax (now that they have what they came for) and to just look the other way when they happen to see the young man in question (Dan). This is important! We feel that the ‘other’ family has over reacted on several occasions (I suppose you can’t blame people for being vigilant) and in some ways they have (unwittingly) given Dan just the kind of attention that made him curious and unwilling to let go. Just a few kind words to him and a request to move on would have diffused the situation. The family did the opposite. Alternatively, just one phone call to us (Dan’s parents) to put us into the picture, would have probably stopped the whole thing in it’s tracks. Sadly this is not how people think here; they get alarmed very quickly and call the police.  The police are in the business of ‘nailing’ offenders, and yes Dan gave them what they were looking for. 

So now we’re having to prepare for the criminal case, including hiring a lawyer, which costs an absolute fortune. What madness; we’re having to spend all this money just to keep Dan out of jail. Jail (for any length of time) would cause a massive set-back for Dan. He doesn’t need jail; he needs therapy. Please pray for a miracle here; the case to be dropped and Dan to (begin to) see his need for help.

Meanwhile Dan has been offered a full time car detailing job here in Plant City, and we’re excited for him. Dan has done his drug test, and filled in all the paper work; now we’re waiting for the call that all is clear and he can start work. Hopefully these court cases will not spoil this wonderful opportunity for him to work professionally, 5 days a week.

family matters

Marcia finished her job at the end of January. She was working as an Occupational Therapist with children at Pediatric Therapy Services, in Lakeland & Brandon. A very intense job with children in serious need, often kids that are extremely hard work. In December Marcia felt the release in her spirit to give her notices and finish. Before then, she considered working Part Time at PTS, but by now it had become clear she really needed to leave & move on altogether.  She’s hoping to focus on working with parents; after all it’s the parents who need to be doing most of the therapeutic work. 

While Marcia hopes & expects to continue working with (children and their) parents, preferably through a weekly TV program (SNAIL & immunization, which we have in preparation), she is very keen to pick up the Psycho Drama as well as PlayBack Theatre. We are beginning to recruit for a weekly training workshop (Play by Ear) out of which people will be invited to participate in PLayBack Performances (STORY-ROUND, televised) and to be involved in Psycho Drama (the HOT-HOUSE). Later this year we expect to have TV Studio equipment up & running, so that we can video-record these (weekly) activities.

Dan picked up his life here in Plant City, after visiting his birth dad in London, UK, which has had quite an impact on him. I believe he is a little calmer as a result of meeting Neil, who was very kind to Dan and has invited him to come & visit some more.  Dan would love to go back straight away, but he is also aware that he needs to take hold of his future a little more before he makes that second visit. But now a complication has troubled the waters!

Dan got arrested by the police just over a week ago now, and spend a night in a jail in Tampa. A nasty surprise this is for us all. A week earlier we had a surprise visit from a local police offices, telling us that Dan was being accused (by a local girl of 16) of stalking her, namely following her in his (Dan’s/ really my) car. Apparently he also made unwelcome phone calls to her; I’m not sure even if that is true. The visiting officer described what would happen if there was another ‘incident’. The incident that got this officer involved that night was the fact that Dan had bumped into this girl & her family at a local gas station. It was a complete surprise to Dan to see her there, and as soon as this family saw Dan they began to be verbally abusive to him. Strange enough, they felt the need to call the police shortly afterwards, and the police was happy to oblige (a 16 year old girl can exercise quite a bit of power here).

We didn’t know what to think of it all, and got on with the business of life. Marcia & I kept a very close eye on Dan. The trips that we allowed him to make into Plant City were always short and with very clear & direct instructions. Yet a week later (Friday night again) Dan didn’t return from a brief trip to Blockbusters, where we had sent him to collect a DVD. At 1 am in the morning Dan finally called us from the Tampa jail where he had been taken. At Blockbusters Dan had run into the same girl again, as he was pulling out of the car-park. The police was called, and they decided to chase after Dan who was on his way home, and arrest him just a few hundred yards from our house. The car was impounded and kept in some storage place over the weekend. We could only get in out on Monday morning; it cost $220. You wonder, why didn’t the police give us a chance to pick the car up; I could have walked there, it was so close. But no. Dan was given quite a rough treatment by 2 police officers, while this girl & her family stood there shouting abuse at him. I’m amazed at this kind of treatment. It looks like the policeman jumped to the conclusion that Dan was a nasty stalker deserving of being bundled into a police car, of a night without sleep in jail, of the expense of getting the car back and the cost of BAIL ($500).

Now we’re looking for an attorney and having to get ready for a court case. The expense goes on. But what is this about? I don’t think there’s any credible evidence of Dan stalking, but this girl & her family, who have appeared out of no-where,  seem to have impressed the police with their stories. In these lean times, it may be, that making an arrest helps the officer get a certain quota; I don’t know, but this officer seemed so keen. Even the first night when he was at our home (first time we heard that something was up)  he seemed so happy to spell out the procedure of arrest, jail in Tampa, bail, court case etc. What is going on here? Are we being abused by the lower end of Plant City? Has Dan done something we don’t know about? Or is he being used as an easy target. I’m told there are people in this little town who would love to play the victim game, and who are always looking to typecast some young man as a ‘criminal’. Crazy stuff!

The court date we are given is in March, and so it seems that Dan cannot make a 2nd trip to the UK before then. On that day, Dan will be asked to make a plea (guilty or not guilty) and after that he’ll be given another date foe the actual court case. While we believe that God has allowed for this crazy situation to occur (Dan has had a taste of prison life) we also see it as ‘enemy activity’ designed to take Dan away from heaven’s blessings and hinder us in our efforts to see our dreams fulfilled. So we are standing against this craziness and with heaven’s authority we proclaim that these false accusations come to nothing; this whole situation will disintegrate , and we WILL move on in God’s purposes, and that includes Dan.

You know how at immunization you get a little bit of the disease injected so that your body can build anti dotes in order for the body to stand strong against this disease. We believe that something similar is happening here, and that this situation will teach Dan to stand firm against any temptation to play dangerous games, make unwise moves, or do stupid things. Please pray for us and for Dan in particular. He needs to break through his natural limitations and his natural blind spots, in order to wise up, to learn to function as normal (which has eluded him so far), to get & keep a job, make good friends (especially at the River Church) and to develop a spiritual life. We live in hope!

Billy continues to perform in Retirement Homes. The doors of many places are wide open  to him. He loves singing & telling stories, and this regular work gives him a tremendous opportunity to grow in this kind of presentation and to learn to flow in the spirit. Billy also continues to film Psalms (on location in the central Florida region) and is learning to edit etc. He is very keen to press on with the Psalms and to get started with filming short stories from the Old Testament, using a multi camera system. We’re hoping to put many short films on the internet, as well as broadcast the 3 programs Marcia is hoping to do (Snails & Dinosaurs/ Story-Round/ The Hot House). To see the whole vision of what we believe God has called us to do, see our web-site: www.entertainingangels.us.

We’re hoping to develop an Internet Community (of friends) that will enjoy our programs and give us feedback etc. Marcia is hoping to start a SHOP with craft materials, jewelry, postcards, fabrics, special paper etc. She is also hoping to become a guest speaker at Universities, colleges, (therapeutic) work places and churches. I would like to perform (and speak) in prisons, as well as in (some) churches, (Bible) schools, colleges & universities; small theatres, if at all possible, and maybe even bookstores and cafes. But ultimately we need to video tape our work and put it on the Internet. 

How we do all this financially, only God knows; we trust that day by day we will do all that we need to do. We’re working on some ideas, constantly studying our options, but what’s more, constantly checking in with heaven. Meanwhile our focus is on the stories that inspire. Please pray for us, for our protection, and that the river shall flow through our lives!

family matters

Last Christmas Eve Marcia & Dan flew to the UK, where they spend a few days in London and a few days in the Rhondda, Wales, where we used to live before moving to Florida.

In London, after resting for a day or two, they met with Dan’s birth father Neil, his partner Elaine and their son Jordan. Dan had been a little nervous, but also eagerly anticipating meeting the man that was his father when Dan was born. Things worked out as well as could be expected. Dan & Neil very much enjoyed each other’s company, and were both quite in awe of the other. They look alike; even their behavior and mannerisms are quite similar.

Marcia & Dan also met with Gel, Dan’s foster mom from the time he was a 6 month old traumatized baby until we adopted him a year later. Gel’s partner Colin has died some time ago; she has 2 adult daughters, Emma & Amy, and an adopted son Scott. Emma has a son of 8 years; Callum. Dan slipped (back) into this lively family as if he never left; quite amazing to see that happen. He has always considered himself a part of this family, which gives him wonderful acceptance & appreciation and it gives him 2 sisters, a brother and a mother (wonderful Gel). 

Together with Marcia & Dan, the 2 families decided to come out together for an evening of bowling, something Dan LOVES to do. What a celebration of life and of healing! Meanwhile there’s SO MUCH brokenness and so much damage in the lives of most of these people…; the stories would be shocking and overwhelming to hear.

Now that I’m writing this (Marcia & Dan are back in Florida) I see how Dan has changed through this opportunity to reconnect with his past. While some questions remain unanswered, and a lot of the damage done (in Dan’s early life) seems (not: is) irreversible, just by reconnecting with his past, and especially meeting Neil face to face, has helped Dan to be(come) himself, that little bit more. Most of the time he seems more relaxed, less prone to blow his top. He has let go of his anger!  Now, just occasionally, he falls back into an old behavior (of getting angry too quickly).

Even when he was only 8 or 9 years old, Dan got in touch with the root of his anger: he was FURIOUS with Neil, for the way Neil had treated his (birth) mother, Michele. In those months Dan absorbed serious levels & amounts of aggression.  This happened while he was just a few months old. (Try imagine what this DOES to a BABY…) Marcia & I considered it a great breakthrough that Dan could ‘place’ his anger (when he was 8 or 9). But then we found that no improvements followed; he remained a deeply angry boy/ teenager. Together with the enormous lack of attachment that Dan ’suffered’ in the first few months of his life, growing up was (and has been) hugely difficult and challenging for Dan. Totally under equipped, almost permanently shut-down, and burdened with fear. Quite impossible; but God!

Marcia & I found that by bringing Dan into the atmosphere of worship (the wonderful churches & conferences that we’ve attended over the years) things changed. The wonderful Holy Spirit of God has done a healing work in him, most of the time without Dan being aware of this, other then feeling good (to be in this place). Dan made some great friends in the church in the Rhondda Valley (South Wales), and began to have the beginnings of a faith life. Even during our London years (before moving to Wales) Dan received much healing just by being in that wonderful atmosphere of worship (music). From Wales we moved to Florida, where we’ve been members of the River Church led by Pastors Rodney & Adonica Howard-Browne. This church celebrates Summer Camp & Winter Camp each year, 7 days of celebration, mornings & evenings. A tremendous atmosphere of worship, growing in intensity over the course of the week, Dan has spend many hours lying down (on some chairs) half asleep, as if under heavens anesthetic to receive healing. 

It was only a few months ago when Marcia & I came under the conviction that the time had come for Dan to go back to London. We had been praying for BREAKTHROUGH with Dan; he seems to be so stuck. Breakthrough didn’t come, but Dan got mature enough to get ready to confront his past. He was apprehensive to meet Neil (very conflicting feelings) and very keen to meet Michele (which hasn’t happened yet). To our delight,  Neil was very approachable and happy to meet with Dan (and Marcia). Dan is not a talker, and when he has conflicting feelings, he won’t communicate at all. Even so, Dan was delighted to discover that Neil was such a nice man, and the 2 resemble each other in many ways (external & internal). Dan is keen to spend more time with Neil, and meet the whole family, possibly. That should happen sometime, while Dan may need a level of protection, to not fall into behaviors that will not be helpful later on (smoking/ drinking/ drugs/  etc..).

We hope to get word from Michele, Dan’s birth mom, and when that happens and the time is right for Dan, we’ll be making another trip to London. How wonderful to have the promise that eventually Dan will be fully himself, clear, strong, mature, independent, capable, reliable, happy etc. We believe, by God’s grace, it’s there for him.

singing diary

I began singing in the Retirement Homes in this area (Tampa Bay/ Brandon/ Lakeland) about 14 Months ago, and I have connected with around 80 Homes. A few of them apart, all these Homes are very happy to have me come in for singing & telling; some of these Homes have really taken me to heart and want me to come in regularly (or as often as I can make it). All together it’s been VERY SPECIAL to make these connections and these friendships.

This Month, December 2008, I finish my third run of going into most of the Homes that I know, which means that in those 14 Months I’ve gone into most of the Homes three times. There’s one place that I visit once a Month; I’ve been there at least 7 or 8 times. A tremendous experience it has been; I’ve learned so much, and I feel I’ve come a long way.

Wednesday December 17th, going into Hudson Manor on Davis Island in Tampa, 2nd time here. I was here not long ago, and people liked me so much that they wanted me to come back a.s.a.p., hence today. The Activities Director has invited me to perform at 3 PM.

When I arrive there’s confusion at reception. Nobody knows I’m scheduled to sing today, and the Act. Director has gone out with a group, shopping at Walmart. All I can do is trust that they’ll be back on time, so I set up as usual and wait. Waiting before singing (and telling) can be a good thing; it helps with getting focussed and gearing up to deliver. However, waiting a long time, can have the opposite effect. You begin to think that the moment of sparking has gone, and it may be better to pack up & go.

The shopping party arrived back 40 minutes after I am supposed to start. When the Activities Director appears, I ask her, wasn’t I supposed to be starting at 3 PM. That’s the time she invited me for. No, she says, you’re in the schedule for 3.30 PM.  OK, but it’s now 3.40 PM and I don’t know what time the room needs to be available for supper.  

I suggest that perhaps it wasn’t such a good idea to invite me on an afternoon with an afternoon shopping trip. Not at all, she says, you can just sing in the time that is left. I have lots of artists coming here who are very happy to use whatever little time they are given.

Basically she’s brushing me off. She doesn’t want to admit that she had forgotten all about my coming to the Home (at her invitation). Instead of saying sorry for the difficulties she’s caused, she gets aggressive with me, and tells me off for being unhappy with the rushing and the lack of time to perform. I offer to come back another time, but she doesn’t want to hear of it. No, she’ll get the people together quickly and I can get started straight away. 

Moments later she’s back to tell me that I must finish at 4.30 PM, because the kitchen staff need the room to set up for supper. That would give me just over half an hour, which for my kind of presentation is very short; I usually have one hour.

While he A.D. walks off to gather more residents, I approach the kitchen staff about the timing of things. They tell me that they’re happy to set the tables quietly while I perform, and so I only need to finish at 4.45 PM. Just before starting my short set, I tell the A.C. that the kitchen staff is happy to give me until 4.45 PM.

At 4.20 PM less then half an hour into my set, the A.C. walks up to me, and tells me that I HAVE to finish at 4.30 PM sharply.

And so I do. The whole thing has become a bit of a farce. The few people present are restless or not very present. They’ve already had a busy day, and the timing of my singing is wrong. In fact, last time I sang here the audience was double the size; most people have gone to their rooms to rest, for obvious reasons.

I pack up and prepare to leave, not quite sure what to do. The A.C. has disappeared; I’m tempted to just walk out the door, and forget about this place. However, I’ve been invited, and I’ve been offered pay, and I feel I should claim what’s due to me. So I fill in the required forms (which I already had on me) and head for reception to hand them in.

Two surprises follow. First: the A.C. sits behind the reception desk, filling in for the receptionist. I see her there and hesitate speaking to her. She will not listen to me, I don’t think, and she’ll be rude again. I’m not interested in being at the receiving end of her aggressive attitude. I’ve been there (in TV production); done that, and moved on. No need for a repeat of that kind of trouble.

Then the second surprise: while I hesitate, the administrator appears (out of nowhere it seems). She had apologized to me earlier for the delay etc. and had been very kind to me.

So I approach her, give her the documents, and give her a brief explanation of what happened earlier. Perhaps it would have been better to invite me for another day, I suggest. The A.C. overhears these words, and jumps in to oppose. Her attitude has not changed one little bit (as I suspected), and she’s ready to shut me up (once more). The phone rings and the A.C. has to pull away to answer. Great, at least I don’t have to argue, and it gives me a chance to suggest that something is really wrong with the way the A.C. has handled the situation. The administrator hears my brief account, and I’m out the door.

When I arrive home the A.C. has already left a message saying that I will not be welcome to return to Hudson Manor. As if I wanted too…

In almost every Home that I visit, I am received with respect and with open arms. Today was very much an exception, I’m glad to say. I do hope to see the people of Hudson Manor again. My first time singing there was outstanding; the spirit moved in a remarkable way; people were very touched. I imagine the A.C. will eventually be caught in her own aggression and either change her ways or be out of there. Eventually I should be able to go back; heaven’s kingdom is on the move; no stopping it!

December 19th, singing in Southerland PLace, Tampa. Second time here; first time went really well. I’ve discussed over the phone the need for a quiet room, so people can be focussed. Cynthia, the Activities Director has prepared an excellent space, and begins to gather the Residents as soon as I get there.

Apart from the usual songs (Little Love/ One day/ In His Way/ Beatitudes/ Love Never Fails/ Touch Eternity? Aaron’s Blessing) I do a long version of the Moses story; a risky thing to do, but the people stay with it quite well; God’s wonderful Holy Spirit is moving through the telling and singing. Altogether a great time. Several members of staff are present all the way through; afterwards they comment on how well I communicate ever with the Alzheimer Residents.  It’s the Holy Spirit, and I’m so thankful for God’s presence. What a privilege! What ever bad feelings were left from my previous ‘gig’ those are all gone; I’m so happy to be a channel of God’s love.

Tuesday December 23rd I’m singing in Ybor City at the Healthcare & Rehab Center. I’ve been here several times before, but not in quite a while. Sweet people here; some of them quite far gone. Like the previous times, today is another wonderful celebration. I tell the story of Jacob dreaming about the ‘Ladder-from-Heaven’. It’s a wonderful story; I try to keep things simple, and people stay with me all the way through. The Angel Whisper song is such a blessing. A great way to finish the year, and to finish this ‘tour’ of the Tampa, Brandon, PLant City & Lakeland Retirement Homes. It has been a very positive experience. I look forward to going back into all these places. Perhaps I should also begin to go into the Homes in St. Petersburgh. Something to pray about.

Several Homes send me a Christmas Card expressing their appreciation for my work; I’m touched and count myself privileged. Next year is going to be GREAT. Perhaps I can also make a start with going into some churches, and beyond that I would like to put my name down at some Christian Agencies and begin to sing & tell all over the USA. God knows what’s in store. Happy New Year!